And We’re Back!

And just like that we’re back with another session of A Look in the Mirror!

I am just extremely excited to be back in the presence of such wonderful young ladies, all ready to learn about self-esteem, their worth and so many other things. I had almost all my girls from last session sign up, which was an amazing feeling! Needless to say, I was ready for a new session!

This year I broke the ages down into three separate sessions: girls ages 10-12, 13-15 and 16-18. The girls were all so amazing! I can’t wait to see what the next several weeks bring!

So, a lot of my sign-ups had prior plans or did not show…and I got really discouraged. I wondered if I was supposed to be doing this, or if I was doing something wrong, but I introduced a new function to my classes this session and so far it has blessed me tremendously. The girls write how they feel at the start of class and at the end of class, so that I can keep track of their progress. I came home after a long day yesterday and decided to open my “mailbox” and got the note that confirmed it all for me:

Not only that, but today I saw a few of my parents and they just gave me such encouragement and THAT is what this is all about. I do this so my girls can be heard, understood and so that they can know how to handle what this world gives them. Life is rough, but my prayer is that they can build their foundational truth and rely on that when things get rough.

Let’s Do It All Again…and Again…Forever.

Well, hello there!

After a much needed break and rest, I’m finally ready to talk about how amazing A Look in the Mirror turned out to be.  I’m still very much in awe of God’s faithfulness to me and how He has pushed me forward this year.  If you’re not aware, I relinquished all rights to my life this year and gave it over to God…and it’s been one of the best decisions ever.

For our last meeting, the girls were asked to say speech, written by them, describing how the program has helped and the difference it made in their lives.  Waterworks.  I cried like a baby because these girls have made such an impact on my life and all had such beautiful words to say.  I’m so proud of them because they faced their fears and did a little public speaking in front of their family and friends.

After we spilled out hearts (and eyes) we enjoyed each other for the last time and had some food and fellowship.  My wonderful friend, Mario Turner, captured both video and photos from the event!

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If you’re interested in bringing this program to your place of business you can do so using the link below:

A Look in the Mirror Contact Form

Tell Me Where Your Worth Lies: Weeks 3-4

So, hey y’all!

I know I was gone last week, but I’m feeling much better and ready to give you another recap of A Look in the Mirror, weeks 3 and 4.

Week Three

During Week 3, we talked about our emotions and reactions to the things that happen around us.  We played a little game of charades, where we examined what our emotions look like in action.  We talked about times that made us feel that way and discussed how to work through our emotions.

We also talked about perception vs. reality.  People will tell you that you are something that you’re not.  Ugly.  Fat.  Stupid.  But the beautiful thing about living life is that we make our own realities.  Who cares what people say about us?!  As long as we know who we are…we’ll be just fine.  The girls made affirmations that remind them of exactly who they are.

Week Four

This is most likely my favorite week so far.  We talked about self confidence and our worth.  I asked each girl to discuss their worth and how that relates to the people we choose to surround ourselves with.   All class we sat in a circle of positivity, so that we have can an honest discussion and so that we can see each other when we’re talking.

We talked about some tough stuff: school, bullying, confidence.  We also did the work.  We discussed what confidence means to us.  Each girl talked about what negative and positive impacts their friends have on them.  This allows us to really analyze who we’re surrounded by and how they affect our lives.

We ended class by sharing positive thoughts about each other.  Each girl stood in the middle of the circle and was given positive thoughts by the others who remained outside of the circle.  Admittedly, I had no plans on participating myself.  I felt like this was an activity for my girls, but they encouraged me to participate.  After a terrible work week and stressful home week (our home needs MAJOR repair after the hurricane) it was nice to hear such positive things from them.

This program has rejuvenated something in me that my regular work doesn’t allow: freedom to feel.  As adults we’re told to swallow our feelings, to keep it moving, to keep pushing and to keep making money, but following my dreams and having something to give to these girls has given me a joy that I cannot describe.

If you’re interested in bringing this program to your place of business you can do so using the link below:

A Look in the Mirror Contact

Tell Me Something Good: Week 2

Hey y’all!

I’m back again with A Look in the Mirror!  This week we focused on controlling the things that we can and accepting the things that we cannot.  The girls did some activity sheets that asked some of the harder questions: what makes you feel bad?  What makes you feel good?  What is something that you don’t enjoy about yourself?

The point of this exercise was to learn what things we can control about what effects us every day.  Can you control if someone is mean to you?  Of course not, but our response can be controlled.  We can accept that mean people exist, but we don’t have to go to their level and be mean back to them.  Kill ’em with kindness!

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If the girls can identify their triggers early in life, it’ll make their interactions with others a little easier.  They will be able to identify someone negatively affecting them and be able to remove them from their lives.  Next week we discuss more triggers to our emotions and our responses to them.

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If you’re interested in bringing this program to your place of business you can do so using the link below:

A Look in the Mirror Contact Form

She believed she could, so she figured she’d at least try: Week 1

Hey y’all!

So get this…ya girl went ahead and launched her self esteem program!

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I’ve been excited, stressed, nervous and just unbelievably happy!  I can’t believed I actually am doing something I’ve set out to do.  I’ve combated laziness and procrastination and this week I started my program with a group of nine beautiful young ladies.

Each week we have different objectives and lessons to focus on that bring us back to overarching goal of loving ourselves fully.  This week we did introductions and we got to know each other.  We played icebreakers that allowed the girls to forge a bond and learn to communicate with each other.

I can’t wait to spend the next  several weeks with these girls!  They’re a vibrant group filled with questions and such beautiful hearts.  I’ll be posting here every week to recap the sessions as they happen.

If you’re interested in bringing this program to your place of business you can do so using the link below:

A Look in the Mirror Contact Form

New year, who dis?

Happy New Year!

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I usually spend New Year’s Eve at church, but this year I opted for a quiet evening at home.  I wanted to reflect internally without the excitement for the next year in my mind.  Truthfully, I’m not excited about 2018.  I am hopeful for a more positive duration of the year.  Baby, I got GOALS.

Last year’s goals for 2017 was simple, but complex in action.  My goal was to set intention for the entire year by starting new habits early on.  So, I started writing more, exercising, cooking more and sharing my positivity with others.  I went so hard at the beginning, not preparing myself for a potential break, that I burned out…in all areas.  Work took over and made it hard to write.  I got out of the habit of working out and eventually burned out.  I felt like no one appreciated my positivity so I kept it to myself.  I literally spent my last vacation of the year with periods of high activity and periods of sickness and exhaustion, but no true rest.

2017 taught me a lot on how I’m going to make things work for me in 2018, so here’s how I’m going to get my entire life for the whole year:

  1. I’m setting my intentions daily towards weekly goals. Setting yearly goals can seem overwhelming, especially when it’s January 1st and you’re still in your PJs at noon instead of at a Zumba class.  Start small.  It’s okay to make smaller goals that contribute to your larger goals.  Life is about taking baby steps.
  2. It doesn’t matter if you land on your feet…just land. I’ve dealt with some hard times this year, especially at my work.  Your job is where you spend the most waking hours a day…and that’s depressing.  This year I’m going to continue to work hard, but I’m not going to make my work environment work for me.  I’m going to continue to nurture my entrepreneurial dreams while working my 9 to 5.
  3. Rest your weary eyes and your equally weary mind, chile. I am EXHAUSTED.  Mental and physically.  Self-care is monumentally important and I am lacking in that department.  This year I intend on resting.  I’m going to take more walks to clear my mind, I MUST KEEP WRITING and most importantly I have to be consistent with my journaling.  That’s the major key.
  4. Give it to God and go to sleep. Pray intentionally, consistently, purposefully and take a nap.

Ending this new year on a positive note is important to me.  I want to look back on it all and see all my hard work in front of my eyes.  Most importantly I want to take care of myself.  How do you set intentions for the next year?

Reasons why I’m not here for it. At all.

So, today has been a day.  Mr. Terence Crutcher died earlier this week by the hands of the police.  There is not a logical reason that I’ve heard for why the police fired their weapons at him and you cannot convince me of one. There is a dash cam video SHOWING Mr. Crutcher complying with officers with his hands in the air ONLY TO BE SHOT SECONDS LATER.  If that isn’t enough, right in my hometown of Charlotte, NC a black man was killed for alleged having a firearm.  It has been reported the officer yelled “He has a gun” and shot him four times.  No warning.  No reasoning.  Just out here exterminating Black folk like roaches. All of these events, plus the MANY other victims of death by cops have me heated.  I’m OVER ALL OF IT TODAY…and here’s why:

  1.  The top headline on CNN’s website at some point today has been about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s divorce.  When I tell you I do not care about this I truly mean it.  Both of them have millions and neither pays my bills.  NEXT!
  2. The all lives, blue lives, cat lives matters people are still in existence.  I still don’t understand why this is a thing.  IF ALL LIVES TRULY MATTERED TO YOU THEN YOU WOULD BE MAD WITH US!  Simple as that.
  3. If we can’t protest kneeling at the anthem then what can we do?!  Just leave us alone.    You get mad when we’re in the streets.  You get mad when we silently protest.  Stop trying to take our right to protest away.  No one takes away your right to say or do whatever you want.  Clearly, no one has taken away corrupt cops’ right to wrongfully murder us.  So boom.
  4. Lastly, I just don’t care about what you’ve got going on right now.  On Facebook, we’ve shared in triumph at a marriage, birth of a baby, kids got straight A’s in school and all the things in between.  We’ve grieved the death of family members, the victims of the Orlando shooting, September 11th and every sad moment that goes unmentioned.  If you feel close enough to me to appreciate all of the joy I feel when I talk about my husband or my job or anything else, then empathize with me when I grieve with my brothers and sisters during this difficult time.   I don’t want to hear your rebuttal to anything I have to post on my Facebook.  I don’t want to see anything you post that goes against the fact that Black lives are being taken constantly by the hands of the police.  I don’t want to hear any of that.  I’m over stifling my feelings to keep friends that I only talk to or see ONCE A YEAR.  My heart physically hurts by all that’s going on in this country and I have the right to be over all of it.